Thursday, August 20, 2009

My phobia? Flying monkeys

I've known a lot of people with a lot of odd phobias. I have a friend who is so afraid of birds that, when one got in her house, she took the children and left, and made her husband come home and get the bird out before she would return. It was a sparrow. In the basement. Behind a closed door.

I love birds and critters of all kinds. I talk to squirrels and chipmunks. A mouse got into the office where I used to work, and I tried to feed him crackers. I was raised in the Everglades, so I can handle snakes, spiders and all sorts of crawly things. I'm not fond of wasps, but that's just common sense more than a phobia.

Only one creature on earth gives me the serious creepies: Monkeys. I cannot stand to look at monkeys.

I blame this odd phobia on the flying monkeys from The Wizard of Oz. When I was little, I used to hide behind the sofa when the movie was on. Mom always thought I was afraid of the Wicked Witch. Oh, no. It was the monkeys.

Have you seen the movie recently? They are so sinister and eerie and creepy. They can swoop down and carry you off with their nasty little monkey hands and feet. They're like evil little people, only they're monkeys. With wings. In hats. Man.

I watched the movie last year, called my mom up and said, "No, Ma, those are really flying monkeys. Those things are real. That's not a costume. Look at them. They are so freaking me out here." She's probably still laughing.

Luckily, monkey phobia is a little easier to live with than bird phobia. I don't have much exposure to any monkeys, much less flying monkeys, in Southwestern Ohio. I know a lot of people think they're cute, have them as pets, dress them up in little outfits. Trust me, they are evil. Didn't we learn that from "Planet of the Apes"?

I have to go take a shower now. Ick.


  1. Oh now you cannot possibly be clumping one of my favorite childhood pets into this "evil monkey" category...the squirrel monkey...I had one of these name Honey, for her color, and she was the sweetest thing. I dressed her in doll clothes and took her so many places, she used to like to ride on the back of our little dog, here is a link to take a peak at her, she was very small and very sweet. When we would eat, she would just come to the side of the cage with her hand out and look at you so pleadingly,,I really miss her.

  2. Thank you so much for posting that picture of Dorothy being carried away by the monkeys! I remember having that book as a child with that photo plate in it. Could you let me know where you got the picture from, I have been looking for that book for years. Great post!

  3. Hi, Nina. I snagged it off the internet, but I can probably find the book for you. Just a sec, let me check Alibris.

  4. Here you go. They have it with the illustrations starting at about nine bucks.*listing*title

  5. I agree 100%. Those flying monkeys are very scary! I too was freaked out by them as a kid. What the heck were they anyway? What was inside those creepy little monkey suits. Blech!

  6. I have a huge fear of monkeys and birds.
    You are killing me with this post, YIIIIIIIIKES!
    I had a bird fly in my hair when
    I was a kid. I hit the deck if one even flies near me.
    And monkeys, well, I guess I don't need to explain that to you.

  7. yes, those monkeys are rather scary!

    heh. there was a whole theme park in south florida: "monkey jungle"...kind of a weird place.

  8. I would cry and break out in hives. . .