In the past week, the television has attacked me a couple of times, and I'm not even talking about the fact that my twentieth DVD player is pooping the bed and trying to eat DVDs. Does anyone else go through DVD players at an alarming rate? I don't know how many I've actually had, but I keep killing them.
But back to the attacking television. Sunday evening, I turned on the news because I hadn't seen any news in several days. I started doing stuff around the house, and before I realized what was happening, Miss USA was on and I was watching it. Now, in my defense, I wanted to see Miss Oklahoma's dress to see if Johnathan Kayne from Season Three of Project Runway had designed it. The dress was absolutely amazing, but not designed by Kayne. I tried to find a picture of it for you, but couldn't, so you got the LOL bunny instead.
Miss USA is more than a little scary, especially the question and answer section. Why do they ask these girls politically based questions? Most of them could give a flying fig about politics. They're uninformed, under incredible pressure, and give the most ridiculous answers. Miss Oklahoma basically said that the Arizona Immigration Law was suitably cute. Miss Michigan called contraceptives "a controlled substance." Oh, and she tripped in her gown. And she won. What did this teach me? It's okay to be kind of clumsy and vapid. I guess that's an important life lesson. I consider myself bettered.
Now, for Attack Number Two, this morning, I turned the TV on, and up popped The Real Housewives of New York on Bravo. Ah, Bravo, why are you feeding us this silliness? I'll watch Top Chef and The Fashion Show, and I'm kind of intrigued by this new reality art competition show that's going to debut in a couple of weeks, but stuff like Housewives and House Flippers and whatnot just does not interest me. I must be in the minority, though, because these shows do really well.
The episode was halfway over when I turned it on. What I saw was straight out of a Bunel movie. One housewife was clearly losing her mind over a filet mignon at a dinner party. Now that I think about it, they did appear to be drinking white wine with beef. Maybe that cause the initial break with reality.
What I don't understand is this: If these ladies can't be in each other's company for an evening without someone have a throw down fight, why do they continue to socialize? While it may make for interesting "reality" TV, if it is indeed real, the stress of these kinds of continuous combative situations would make me an absolute nervous wreck. Would you hang out with people who made you so angry so often? Is that fun? Or would you just do it when the cameras were rolling? Yeah, I don't get it either. Real Housewives of Etsy? It's called The Forums, and I guess people sometimes behave the same way there.
Okay, it's me. Now I know why I keep killing DVD players. I use them constantly because 98% of television absolutely sucks.